The older I get the slower my brain gets. I no longer jump out of bed thinking 'This year I'm going to do blahblahblah!' Instead my head slowly unpacks things a little bit at a time. Which is why it has taken me 16 days, one photography conference and a ton of family time to really suss out my goals for 2017. All these things have been building slowly overtime and I feel like this year they are all coming crashing through. Like a football team out of the banner onto the field. But probably without the cheering.
I'm going to do something now that terrifies me. I'm going to make them public so you can all shake your heads at me when they aren't done yet. This year we are opening up a studio location (scary thing number one), buying a house (scary thing number two), and I am going to study to become a certified pro from the PPofA (scary thing number 3. Those tests are hard). There. I said it. It's out there and now I've got to do them. Now I know what you're thinking. Brandy, you really need to figure out how to answer your damn emails faster (excuse to get an apple watch?) I know I know. Trust me that's on the long list along with exercise and meditation and cleaning my house more. But I won't bore you with all the little things on that list. Instead let me bore you with this:
Self improvement is the worst. Can I just say this whole not eating cheese and only having one glass of wine a night so I will live long enough to see my kids graduate high school thing blows. I can promise you the long list of things I've badly attempted to do these last two weeks isn't going to last through the month. Eat healthier? I had birthday cake for lunch. Oh wow I had that for lunch yesterday too. (Damn you weekend events that involve cake!) Ok but the sleep more thing. I'm definitely going to do that. I mean tomorrow obviously. Ok ok but cleaning the house more often! That one is absolute! (actually that one is going really well. Apparently the 3 year old loves to clean? He may have been swapped at birth).
I'm sure those things are on everyone's list. And the second our lives get busy again I know it will all be out the window. But the struggle is the important part right? It's the quiet burning to be better than we are that keeps polishing us into worthwhile souls. So struggle with me this year while I fail miserably to be the very best version of myself. While I start each day (some. maybe. probably at least a few.) with naive optimism that I will cram these 3 massive things into a year already jammed packed with mountains of other personal goals, tiny needy humans and running a small business.
“Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them.” - Albert Einstein